​Much has changed since I first started offering Tantra Massage back in 2007 when there was hardly any tantra massage in Scotland, Ireland or even England. Today there are many more therapists and other professionals offering what is now a commonly used term of tantra massage. It's become a generic term in fact, however not all are genuine tantra massages and many are no more than exotic massages with happy endings. So what's the difference?  In one word, intention.

It's what the intention is behind the offering that most qualifies the product.  The difference between an authentic tantra massage and erotic massage is simply that tantra massage seeks to expand, heighten or ground, depending on needs, it seeks to clear energy lines of blockages to encourage the free flow of life force/sexual energy, it will enable the nurturing/feeding of internal organs, and seeks the regulation, harmonisation and integration of the mind, body spirit system. In contrast the erotic massage seeks to stimulate sexual organs to produce short lived pleasure of ejaculation and orgasm.

The following information is the original writing from when I set up One Heart Tantra. Some of appears on several other tantra sites though not with my permission. I suppose imitation is the most sincere form of flattery...! For anyone considering tantra massage either with myself or looking for other genuine practitioners it will serve as a good guide for what to look for in your practitioner and also as a frame-work for a session with One Heart Tantra.

Please feel free to ask questions either by commenting or by emailing me.

What is Tantra Massage?

Tantra Massage is a combination of loving touch that gently soothes the body and senses while at the same time awakening the spiritual life force that we know of as sexual energy. The entire experience is essentially a ritual that celebrates the whole being that you are, and encourages you to completely relax into a state of receiving conscious touch and pleasure. By surrendering action, many new experiences and states of consciousness are available which promotes self-confidence, increases your energy and capacity for pleasure, and promotes deep inner peace. We all have a self-imposed limit to receiving pleasure; a glass ceiling that we don't even know is there! Tantra Massage helps us to expand our capacity for pleasure by focusing on learning how to fully receive.

     
Session Framework

A Tantra Massage Session includes the whole body, including the genital areas in both women and men. In Tantric philosophy, the body is seen as a whole that is greater than the sum of its parts, a temple that is the expression of the spirit and life force of the individual. To ignore a given part or area is to ignore part of the spiritual essence of the person. There is a liberal use of vegetable based oils, combined with high-quality essential oils. It is an intimate, warm, and relaxing space, accentuated by soothing colours, spiritual and sensual images and music. The other, most important aspect of the session is to awaken the life force potential, referred to in Tantra as "Kundalini" or Shakti, so that it may be used to stimulate, nourish and nurture the whole body in such a way as to produce deep relaxation while at the same time enlivening the body's capacity for ecstasy and pleasure. Through specific and repetitive patterns of conscious touch,  the therapist guides the energy to help the client access profound states of bliss and expanded consciousness. These states of new awareness may last for hours or even days, encouraging the recipient to gain a new perspective into their true nature. 

The genital massage that accompanies each session is known as the Yoni massage (for females) or Lingam massage (for males). This part of the massage only occurs after almost three quarters of the time has been devoted to the rest of the body, awakening it and preparing it for this honouring. Since this is not a sexual or erotic massage, and physical orgasm is not the goal, male clients are encouraged toward a new experience – one that does not necessarily include ejaculation. 

During this part of the massage, the utmost respect and gentleness is used in order to extend the experience of safety and sacredness that was established in the beginning of the Session through ceremony and rhythmic breathing. Once the life force is awakened, it is then lovingly encouraged to flow upward through the energy centres of the body, known as "chakras", and outward to all the extremities. As the energy and ecstasy expands, it cleanses and activates the entire individual, re-vitalising and nourishing the body's organs. Sometimes this may produce an emotional release, deep insight, or mystical experiences. 


The Benefits 

The primary benefit of a Tantra Massage is that of self-knowledge. To become acquainted with yourself as a sexual being is to also initiate an awareness of your Self as a Being that is not just a mind or body. Through conscious touch, your body and mind will heal and re-pattern itself naturally from the conditioned beliefs that have permeated society that pleasure is bad, and that spirituality has to involve a denial of our sexuality. Relaxation is the portal, and surrendering control in order to receive without having to give anything in return are the keys which open the door to this awareness of ourselves as pure Spirit.    

Other benefits are improved confidence and health - if we can open to allowing the sexual energy (chi) to move through our body, the vital organs are nourished, starting with the kidneys, and when our kidneys feel full, then we naturally feel we are enough, and that we have enough. When this happens we can find that 'joie de vivre' sparkle once more.

For women, there can be a newfound acceptance that it is really okay to be a sexually powerful and dynamic female. Women will also benefit from same gender touch as it assists with releasing the 'pleasing program' that comes into play in interactions with men. Once the Nectar of the Goddess begins to flow in a woman, then her confidence increases and therefore her sense of value and self-sustainability is expanded. Her ability to respond and flow sexually will change her relationships dramatically as well. 

For men, there will be a new experience as well. The typical issues of premature ejaculation, loss of libido, and goal orientation in intimate relationships undergo a fundamental shift. Tantra Massage teaches men how to separate orgasm from ejaculation, and experience the energy of orgasm throughout the body and in the mind. Gradually, they can also learn to circulate their sexual energy for self-rejuvenation, creativity and health.


What You Need to Know To Prepare 

1. The Massage part of the experience is conducted in a "naturist" or nude format for both giver and receiver. You will be provided with a pareo (sarong) to wear beforehand for the tantric rituals. The environment is kept very warm and comfortable in all climatic conditions. You are asked to bring a towel with you, so that you can shower off the oils afterwards. For men, I request that you do not have an ejaculation for 24 hours before, during and after the appointment. This is to help in reprogramming your inbuilt male conditioning, and begin the journey into new experiences. 

2. I ask that you prepare for the Session before you arrive by showering or bathing, washing your hair, and having your nails trimmed. No perfumes, colognes or excessive make-up please! 

3. You are here to receive. Therefore, touching me is not part of this session. Please honour my boundaries, and just relax and receive.   If I feel my boundaries are compromised, I reserve the right to end the session at any time without explanation.  

4. Since this is your time for you, please allow enough space to enjoy it. Arrive ten minutes before the appointment time if you need to shower, and to change clothes, etc. Allow for some time afterwards for the shower and any questions you may have.  Please do not arrive earlier as this may not be convenient. 

5. You may receive some "homework" after the Session. This may include exercises for self-pleasuring, meditation, breathwork, etc. It is your choice to follow it or not.
           
6. All Tantra Massage Sessions include elements of breath-work, energy alignment and honouring ritual prior to the full body tantra massage including yoni/lingam massage. I ask that my male clients do their best to withhold ejaculation in order to preserve the energy that has been raised during the session. 
           
 7. If there are specific issues you'd like to address during the session, then please book additional counselling time when you make your appointment.

One Heart Tantra is a professional service for those are genuinely seeking positive change in their lives.  I do not offer sexual services and I immediately end an enquiry or advance of this nature.

PREREQUISITES & NOTES:  This session is available only for existing clients who have been working with me for a minimum of 3 sessions.   It is not suitable for conditions of stress, specific healing issues or trauma release - please look to my other sessions such as Healing Focus Tantric Massage, Coaching, Trauma Release or Energy Work instead.



All writing is copyrighted to Lynn Paterson who claims full rights to all website content. Any content theft or breaches of copyright are vigorously pursued through legal action as necessary. If you would like to use any part for media publication you must first gain permission from the author. Sharing is welcomed providing the full article is shared with link to original. 

The divine feminine is that in which desire arises and it calls forth the divine masculine which takes action.... picture an arrow in a bow being pulled back.... that poignant moment of pure potential like a pregnant pause... then the arrow being released, flying straight and true, cutting through the air and then finding and piercing the target.

Another way I see the divine masculine is as the sword of truth...that which cuts away everything that no longer serves, that which is not the truth of the divine. The divine masculine is also in operation when someone stands up for a person's divine and absolute right to be who they are, and to choose and walk the path they desire (assuming no harm is done of course...) This is the divine aspect of the protector that in the past was not so divine and was only interested in protecting the family, the tribe, village, or country etc. It was aspect that saw a difference between allies and enemies and it could not see that all is one and that the belief in allies creates enemies...and vice-versa.
​
Only the mind can separate the principles of masculine and feminine for they are truly only One.  We all use both principles all the time. I think it's just a re-balancing that is going on in the mind field currently which is placing the emphasis on the feminine. But realistically, if people are going to continue to become more conscious, then continuing the gender war will not be an option. 

Whether you are in a partnership or not, tantra and sacred sexuality coaching helps you to get into yourself in yummy, fun and growth-inducing ways...

Tantra Massage is perfect for couples to explore intimacy in anew way - take the pressure off yourselves to have sexual intercourse.

Exercise in Self-Pleasuring
Here’s a very simple exercise that will help Prolong your sexual Pleasure and also help you to open, expand and find deeper meaning in your sexuality and spirituality – it is also one of the keys for men to be able to separate ejaculation and orgasm.  This is a very simple yet powerful self-care tool and  Prevention is better than a cure as they say!  All in all, I honestly could not give you a better, more effective or more far-reaching meditation to do - ye I know I'm banging on about the great benefits of masturbation yet again!  But if you’d like to read more on the philosophy and benefits you can find the full article called Masturbation, Self-Love and Tantra, click here.

To make love to yourself: Begin to masturbate and stop at the point just before orgasm. Put your attention in your heart, and let the energy go there…. The exact point to stop is the point where you know that one more stroke will make you come.  Just take your hand away, and let the energy go up to the heart – very simple (yes, I know it’s hard…!)  After each rush of energy to the heart resume masturbating, repeating the cycle, until there seems to be no more energy, or when you feel like stopping. There is no prohibition against orgasm, only the requirement to delay it, letting the energy go to the heart first. Delaying orgasms in this manner will make them more intense.

I'm laying on my back.  My partner is barely moving inside of me.  I feel completely open; a cosmic portal...a gateway to the mysteries, the Great Unmoving.

My breath is breathing me, through me. 

A star explodes in my head and the Light from it instructs me to pass through this vortex to focus my intention beyond my head.  My hands know to go there, they feel for the gateway and as it opens I'm there, on the cross, merged with the Christ, Jeshua. 

I'm hardly breathing, in a state of suspended animation as I intentionally allow my  mind to have this experience,  not holding back.  I trust my partner completely to know it's okay, that he can allow me this space.

My whole body, my Being, is illuminated Light, I radiate Gold.  The agony is exquisite and cannot be distinguished from the ecstasy. Love and fear co-exist.  Death is not separate from Life; it is a part of it.  

Something shifts within my mind and doubt creeps in.  Fear now holds more space than Love.  A question in my mind "Have I been abandoned...?  Am I alone?"

I breathe, I relax, I allow expansion into love and the tears come, such a deep deep grief, a chasm that feels unthinkable. I surrender to it. So much release, so much Love floods in, soothing, holding, renewing me, healing.

I'm shattered, spent.

It's so easy to avoid intimacy. Keep yourself busy, do anything to avoid the silence of your heart. Always be helping others and always be giving advice. It's a big clue when you hear someone say that they prefer to give than to receive. I actually think the difficulty in receiving is such a deeply ingrained conditioning within humanity that most people suffer from it to one degree or another and for me personally it's been the major focus of my life and work over the past 10 years and it's what took me into tantra massage in the first place.

In tantra massage giving and receiving are separated and so over time it becomes fairly obvious to see the blocks we have to receiving. And the thing is that it's just not possible to force yourself to receive if you're not ready, nor force another to receive your attention. Yet we all attempt this one way or another and to varying degrees of intensity. In tantra massage, it's a process of learning to allow and deepen into experience whilst releasing our inner blocks/layers of conditioning. The receiver learns how to focus on their inner experience without the need to include or project onto the giver. At the deepest level, the resistance to receiving is really only our resistance to knowing ourselves as Spirit.

It's only when we can trust our own experience that we are able to stop resisting - this journey into trust is something that has as many different ways and forms as there are human beings.

When we own our experiences wholly without the need to appoint another as our authority, then there is nothing left to hide behind and all that is left is ourself. That is intimacy.

Author Naomi Wolfe makes astute points and draws deep-reaching conclusions in "How porn is destroying modern sex lives".  

The article opens: "These days, I am rarely surprised when, after a lecture or book signing, someone will try to talk to me about their addiction to porn and ask where he or she can get help.

As an author and feminist social commentator, I often discuss my work at events and meet a wide spectrum of people who talk to me about sex, relationships and, more increasingly, the impact of pornography on their lives.

There is no stereotype of what this person will look like...."

I too find that many people want to talk to me about their porn habits and how it is deeply concerning to them and destroying all hopes of having a 'normal' relationship. They are often feeling lost and confused. Some say they have never known good sex and some don't even believe that sex (as we know it) has the potential of fulfilling them anyway.

Wolfe states: "Recently, a major British study, the National Survey of Sexual Attitudes and Lifestyles, which questioned more than 15,000 people aged  16 to 74, showed couples are having about  20 per cent less sex per month than they did just ten years ago."

I read another article recently which reported that young Japanese people are being turned off sex to such an extent that they've stopped having sex altogether.

These issues are the result of the repression of sexual energy and urges - the devastating effects are growing year by year.  We are at the stage where we can no longer ignore the total dysfunction of society and culture in general. 

We need to understand that these issues cannot be given a quick fix by banning pornography or even limiting it's availability - though those measures may be helpful in bringing about some relief, they are not a long term solution to this problem. 

Why not? Because the problem is lack of fulfilment, lack of pleasure and the acute anxiety of simply being alive.  We are at war with life itself and until we reverse that compulsion we are not going to change our experience of life.

It is no good to look to see what is normal anymore and to judge our standards against that - normal is not natural, and frankly, I don't believe that we know what natural really looks and feels like as it has been missing for so long.

Delving into the life works of Wilhelm Reich I have recently had validation of what I intuitively knew to be accurate - that suppression of sexuality and the inability to allow our sexual gratification through natural orgiastic expression has created the complete opposite of what we are capable of naturally. 

This suppression, this complete and utter rejection and control of our nature has successfully created a society that has reversed the meaning of life.  We are at a loss for answers because we do not even know what it is that we've lost, so we're searching around for what we think it is we need, or want. 

Nature is simple, naturally.  I believe humans are too:  it’s when we stop, or worse, reverse what is natural that complications and suffering ensue. The answers lay in our body and mind – we hold the natural function of life within us and we must seek that out if we are to bring about a correction that leads us to a fulfilling life. 

Nature itself cannot be corrupted – it is always pure in its being.  Seek connection with Nature to help reverse that which is unnatural.  Become at one with the Earth if you wish to know the truth of who you are, and claim it.

Tantra itself is not a cure - but it can be the start of a wave of change.

RADIO SHOW featuring Lynn

What started as a relatively simple wish to understand what was is important, in various aspects including spiritually and physically, about women choosing to go grey, or continuing to dye their hair.  This fascinating discussion leads Lynn Paterson and Jackie Walker into blethering and exploring issues as diverse as:

• Gandalf the grey
• spiritual haircutting
• hairless men
• lack of grey in grey hair!
• fiery redheads
• being greyceful (spelling intended!)
• astrology
• persecution of witches
• and so much more!

We are sure that this Blether Report will leave you pondering your own choices, and asking yourself questions, after all, that’s what a good blether is for!

Tune in to the Blether Report every Monday at 8pm UK.

http://naturalhealthradio.co.uk/blether-report-shades-grey-hair-pt-1-9-december-8pm-uk/

My interview about Tantra and Kundalini on the I AM Well Show (18.12.13)  is now available to listen on-line:

http://www.blogtalkradio.com/renford/2013/12/18/the-i-am-well-show-with-guest-lynn-paterson

In this interview I share some of my own story about how I got into tantra, my understanding of what tantra and kundalini actually is and how to get involved in tantra.

Do We Really Want Free Energy?

In my tantra work I've worked with quite a few women here in Ireland who have never had an orgasm nor even looked at their genitals - they do not know what they are like. This is an astonishing fact for a lot of people. The suppression of the feminine (Shakti/sexual energy) is particularly aimed at women (it does affect men too) and many feel completely shamed at simply just being a woman - this is often a sub-conscious belief that they are not even aware they have.

Because of the over sexualisation of women and their bodies, it is even more confusing today for women to understand themselves due to so many mixed messages in the media and entertainment industry.  It is no surprise to me that both men and women are still having major difficulties with their sex lives!

We know barely anything about the power of sexual energy - even in tantric circles, we are only just beginners but if we want peace and harmony on Earth,  it is essential we as a species claim our divine birth right and open to becoming fully sexually charged humans as sexual energy is the key to becoming empowered.  This will require a radical re-think about what sex means, and a necessary letting go of our erroneous beliefs we formed through false information being fed to us over millennia.

The battle for power is going on right now in the world and is showing up in numerous variations from war to rising home-fuel prices.  But right now we have the technology for free energy but it's hidden, kept secret and all attempts so far to share it have come to a sticky end.  Why is this any different to our own inner free energy that we are shutting down and hiding away?

Kundalini is ALIVE and waiting to be recognised within each and every one of us - once it is awakened we begin to know our own intrinsic worth and value.  We start to know our power and understand our inter-connectedness with nature.  Sexual energy IS nature...consciously awakening Kundalini means you can and will know the Earth in a truly intimate way.  Once this happens, you know you are part of the Earth, not separate and you KNOW you will be provided for.  Survival mentality disappears and there is no possibility of listening to an outside authority who is trying to control you. This is not an over-night or one-off process; it's a journey of becoming.  Becoming sexually liberated means owning and understanding our power, that which we are born of is the most beautiful and natural expression of God on this planet and in this universe.